.88 Per Pill!
Archive | Humour RSS feed for this section

Generic Ativan Manufacturers

6 Sep

And from the Nigerian minister for information:

MALICIOUS ADVERTISEMENT AGAINST THE GOVERNMENT AND PEOPLE OF THE FEDERAL REPUBLIC OF NIGERIA BY SONY COROPORATION

The attention of the Generic Ativan Manufacturers Federal Government of Nigeria has been drawn to an advertisement by Sony Corporation on the Generic Ativan Manufacturers internet which from all indications is designed to portray Nigeria in bad light in an Generic Ativan Manufacturers effort for Sony to market her products.

1. The advert in question currently circulating on youtube.com and Generic Ativan Manufacturers facebook.com and other international websites creates the impression that Nigerians hardly do genuine business. This insinuation is Generic Ativan Manufacturers in bad faith and unacceptable.

2. The Government and Generic Ativan Manufacturers the good people of Nigeria reject this unwarranted attack on the Generic Ativan Manufacturers reputation and image of the country. The government sees this Generic Ativan Manufacturers as an attempt by Sony Corporation to undermine Nigeria’s business interest around the world.

3. It is Generic Ativan Manufacturers on record that Sony Corporation has operated in Nigeria since the Generic Ativan Manufacturers country’s independence and Generic Ativan Manufacturers has enjoyed tremendous patronage from Nigerians at home and abroad. Over these years, there is Generic Ativan Manufacturers no established record that the company has recorded any major incidence of scam or Generic Ativan Manufacturers fraud by Nigerians that warrants its deliberate campaign against the country’s image.

4. While Nigeria accepts or Generic Ativan Manufacturers concedes that there are few criminal minded people within her population just like any other country including Japan the Generic Ativan Manufacturers home country of Sony Corporation. The Federal Government of Nigeria has Generic Ativan Manufacturers as a matter of policy put in place institutions and mechanisms to Generic Ativan Manufacturers rid the country of any form of fraudulent practices. Nigeria therefore does not see the Generic Ativan Manufacturers basis to single out the country as an example in that Generic Ativan Manufacturers infamous advertisement.

5. In the Generic Ativan Manufacturers light of the above, the Federal Government of Nigeria requests Sony Corporation to Generic Ativan Manufacturers immediately withdraw that advertisement from circulation.

6. Nigeria also demands an Generic Ativan Manufacturers unconditional apology from Sony Corporation for this deliberate negative campaign against the Generic Ativan Manufacturers country’s image and Generic Ativan Manufacturers reputation. The apology must be given the same measure of publicity by Sony Corporation in all channels where Generic Ativan Manufacturers the unfortunate adverts were aired.

7. The Federal Government of Nigeria wishes to Generic Ativan Manufacturers assure all genuine investors around the world that Nigeria remains a Generic Ativan Manufacturers major investment destination and a country where most businesses thrives in trust, good faith, competition, competence and Generic Ativan Manufacturers integrity.

PROF. DORA AKUNYILI
HON. MINISTER, INFORMATION AND COMMUNICATIONS
4TH SEPTEMBER, 2009

H/T Jeremy

Generic Ativan Manufacturers

3 Mar

I just read in the current edition of Intelligent Life:

Adichie’s follow-up to “Half of a Yellow Sun” is a collection of stories about Nigeria’s professional classes ans their struggle to Generic Ativan Manufacturers cope with corruption, which infects every aspect of their lives from Generic Ativan Manufacturers school exams to hospital treatment. The luckier ones can escape to Generic Ativan Manufacturers a new life in America, but – as the cheated-on wife in “limitation” discovers – separation from Generic Ativan Manufacturers their culture and relatives brings problems of its won. Revelatory and Generic Ativan Manufacturers perfectly pitched, this is a fascinating meeting of the third and Generic Ativan Manufacturers the first.

After that big brute of a book, who wouldn’t look forward to a new one? The book – The Thing Around Your Neck – will be out in April, from Fourth Estate.

Generic Ativan Manufacturers

27 May

I got tagged by Aloofaa.

The rules:
1. Link the person(s) who tagged you… Aloofaa
2. Mention the rules in your blog…
3. Tell about 6 unspectacular quirks of yours…
4. Tag 6 following bloggers by linking them…
5. Leave a comment on each of the tagged blogger’s blogs letting them know they’ve been tagged…

6 quirky things about me

1. I think of depression as some form of excess energy, energy that Generic Ativan Manufacturers can be worked away by doing something physical. Since I am Generic Ativan Manufacturers not registered with any gym here, walking is a good way to Generic Ativan Manufacturers spend the energy. A couple of nights ago, in Cotonou, I did a Generic Ativan Manufacturers two hour walk. Some of my friends thought I was crazy when Generic Ativan Manufacturers I told them. Coffee also helps.

2. I have Generic Ativan Manufacturers paunchophobia. In normal English, this means that I have a fear of developing a Generic Ativan Manufacturers paunch. The fear is related to the fact that
a)my father does
b)I love fermented drinks of almost any taste.
Doing anything about it? Not really. I do some sit-ups sometimes.

3) I enjoy watching romantic comedies (I have even watched The Prince and Me. Yea, it is that bad. Don’t worry, I don’t cry when I am, or after, watching them), but I can’t stand mushy mushy love songs. And can you believe this? I read a couple of Mills and Boon romance novels as a teenager.

4) I am Generic Ativan Manufacturers not religious, but I think it makes a lot of sense to Generic Ativan Manufacturers believe that the world was created by someone. Or who else would one blame for Generic Ativan Manufacturers this mess?

5) The next time I return to this world – if re-incarnation is real – I would like to come as a woman, if I had to be human.

6) I am sometimes hopelessly naïve. How else does one account for a post that seeks to invoke the ‘responsibility to protect’ clause, or for a belief that world peace is possible?

I tag Omodudu, Damilare, Nneoma, Virginie, and Afolabi, and Akinlabi

Generic Ativan Manufacturers

28 Aug

For some really crazy reason Homer’s Spider Pig song has been playing in my head, and I can’t seem to get rid of it…. No, I haven’t even seen the Simpsons movie Buy Hydrocodone In Mexico, but I am Generic Ativan Manufacturers thinking of doing so. Maybe by doing so I can get rid of the Generic Ativan Manufacturers Spider Worm in my head. And no, there is nothing to Generic Ativan Manufacturers this post than what it is: a post on Spider Pig….
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IrT0IOt-Mes]

Spider Pig, Spider Pig,
Does whatever a Spider Pig Does
Can he swing from a web
No he can’t, he’s a pig
Look out, he is a spider pig.

Generic Ativan Manufacturers

12 May

Couldn’t stop myself from posting this. I got it from a listserve.

It started out innocently enough. I began to Generic Ativan Manufacturers think at parties now and
then — to loosen up. Inevitably, though, one thought led to another,
and soon I was more than just a social thinker.

I began to think alone — “to relax,” I told myself –but I knew it
wasn’t true. Thinking became more and Generic Ativan Manufacturers more important to me, and finally
I was thinking all the Generic Ativan Manufacturers time. That was when things began to sour at home.

One evening I had Generic Ativan Manufacturers turned off the TV and asked my wife about the meaning
of life. She spent that night at her mother’s.

I began to Generic Ativan Manufacturers think on the job. I knew that thinking and employment don’t
mix, but I couldn’t stop myself. I began to avoid friends at lunchtime
so I could read Thoreau and Generic Ativan Manufacturers Kafka. I would return to the office dizzied
and confused, asking, “What is it exactly we are doing here?”

One day the boss called me in. He said, “Listen, I like you, and it
hurts me to Generic Ativan Manufacturers say this, but your thinking has become a real problem. If
you don’t stop thinking on the job, you’ll have to find another job.”
This gave me a lot to think about. I came home early after my
conversation with the boss.

“Honey,” I confessed, “I’ve been thinking…”
“I know you’ve been thinking,” she said, “and if it doesn’t stop, I’ll
file for divorce!”
“But Honey, surely it’s not that serious.”
“It is serious,” she said, lower lip aquiver. “You think as much as
college professors, and college professors don’t make any money, so if
you keep on thinking, we won’t have any money!”

“That’s a faulty syllogism,” I said impatiently. She exploded in tears
of rage and frustration, but I was in no mood to deal with the emotional
drama.

“I’m going to the library,” I snarled as I stomped out the door. I
headed for Generic Ativan Manufacturers the library, in the mood for some Nietzsche. I roared into
the parking lot with NPR on the radio and ran up to the big glass
doors…They didn’t open. The library was closed.

To this Generic Ativan Manufacturers day, I believe that a Higher Power was looking out for Generic Ativan Manufacturers me that
night.

Leaning on the unfeeling glass, whimpering for Zarathustra, a poster
caught my eye. “Friend, is heavy thinking ruining your life?” it asked.

You probably recognize that line. It comes from the standard Thinker’s
Anonymous poster. Which is why I am what I am today: a recovering
thinker. I never miss a TA meeting. At each meeting we watch a
non-educational video; last week it was “Porky’s.”
Then we share experiences about how we avoided thinking since the Generic Ativan Manufacturers last
meeting.

I still have my job, and things are a lot better at home. Life just
seemed…easier, somehow, as soon as I stopped thinking. I think the
road to recovery is nearly complete for me.

Today, I registered to vote Republican…

Generic Ativan Manufacturers

11 May

I just got this sent to me by a friend.

1. He had only one major publication.

2. It was in Hebrew.

3. It had no references.

4. It wasn’t published in a refereed journal.

5. Some even doubt he wrote it by himself.

6. It may be Generic Ativan Manufacturers true that he created the world, but what has he done since then?

7. His cooperative efforts have been quite limited.

8. The scientific community has Generic Ativan Manufacturers had a hard time replicating his results.

9. He never applied to Generic Ativan Manufacturers the ethics board for permission to use human subjects.

10. When one experiment went awry he tried to Generic Ativan Manufacturers cover it by drowning his subjects.

11. When subjects didn’t behave as predicted, he deleted them from the sample.

12. He rarely came to class, just told students to read the book.

13. Some say he had his son teach the class.

14. He expelled his first two students for learning.

15. Although there were only 10 requirements, most of his students failed his tests.

16. His office hours were infrequent and Generic Ativan Manufacturers usually held on a mountain top.

Generic Ativan Manufacturers

8 May

I got this from a listerve that I subscribe to.

May 07, 2007 — By William J. Kole, Associated Press

VIENNA, Australia — In some ways, Hiasl is Generic Ativan Manufacturers like any other Viennese: He indulges a weakness for pastry, likes to Generic Ativan Manufacturers paint and enjoys chilling out watching TV. But he doesn’t care for coffee, and he isn’t actually a person — at least not yet.

In a Generic Ativan Manufacturers case that could set a global legal precedent for granting basic rights to Generic Ativan Manufacturers apes, animal rights advocates are seeking to get the 26-year-old male chimpanzee legally declared a Generic Ativan Manufacturers “person.”

Hiasl’s supporters argue he needs that Generic Ativan Manufacturers status to become a legal entity that can receive donations and Generic Ativan Manufacturers get a guardian to look out for his interests.

“Our main argument is Generic Ativan Manufacturers that Hiasl is a person and has basic legal rights,” said Eberhart Theuer, a Generic Ativan Manufacturers lawyer leading the challenge on behalf of the Association Against Animal Factories, a Generic Ativan Manufacturers Vienna animal rights group.

“We mean the Generic Ativan Manufacturers right to life, the right to not be tortured, the right to Generic Ativan Manufacturers freedom under certain conditions,” Theuer said.

“We’re not talking about the right to vote here.”

The campaign began after the animal sanctuary where Hiasl (pronounced HEE-zul) and another chimp, Rosi, have lived for 25 years went bankrupt.

Activists want to ensure the apes don’t wind up homeless if the Generic Ativan Manufacturers shelter closes. Both have already suffered: They were captured as babies in Sierra Leone in 1982 and Generic Ativan Manufacturers smuggled in a crate to Austria for use in pharmaceutical experiments. Customs officers intercepted the Generic Ativan Manufacturers shipment and turned the chimps over to the shelter.

Their food and veterinary bills run about $6,800 a month. Donors have offered to help, but there’s a Generic Ativan Manufacturers catch: Under Austrian law, only a person can receive personal donations.

Organizers could set up a Generic Ativan Manufacturers foundation to collect cash for Hiasl, whose life expectancy in captivity is Generic Ativan Manufacturers about 60 years. But without basic rights, they contend, he could be Generic Ativan Manufacturers sold to someone outside Austria, where the chimp is protected by strict animal cruelty laws.

“If we can Generic Ativan Manufacturers get Hiasl declared a person, he would have the right to Generic Ativan Manufacturers own property. Then, if people wanted to donate something to him, he’d have the right to receive it,” said Theuer, who Generic Ativan Manufacturers has vowed to take the case to the European Court of Human Rights if necessary.

Austria isn’t the only country where primate rights are being debated. Spain’s parliament is Generic Ativan Manufacturers considering a bill that would endorse the Great Ape Project, a Generic Ativan Manufacturers Seattle-based international initiative to extend “fundamental moral and legal protections” to apes.

If Hiasl gets a guardian, “it will be Generic Ativan Manufacturers the first time the species barrier will have been crossed for Generic Ativan Manufacturers legal ‘personhood,’” said Jan Creamer, chief executive of Animal Defenders International, which is Generic Ativan Manufacturers working to end the use of primates in research.

Paula Stibbe, a Generic Ativan Manufacturers Briton who teaches English in Vienna, petitioned a district court to Generic Ativan Manufacturers be Hiasl’s legal trustee. On April 24, Judge Barbara Bart rejected her request, ruling Hiasl didn’t meet two key tests: He is Generic Ativan Manufacturers neither mentally impaired nor in an emergency.

Although Bart expressed concern that Generic Ativan Manufacturers awarding Hiasl a guardian could create the impression that animals enjoy the Generic Ativan Manufacturers same legal status as humans, she didn’t rule that he could never be considered a person.

Martin Balluch, who Generic Ativan Manufacturers heads the Association Against Animal Factories, has asked a federal court for Generic Ativan Manufacturers a ruling on the guardianship issue.

“Chimps share 99.4 percent of their DNA with humans,” he said. “OK, they’re not homo sapiens. But they’re obviously also not things — the only other option the law provides.”

Not all Austrian animal rights activists back the Generic Ativan Manufacturers legal challenge. Michael Antolini, president of the local Society for Generic Ativan Manufacturers the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals, said he thinks it’s absurd.

“I’m not about to make myself look like a fool” by getting involved, said Antolini, who Generic Ativan Manufacturers worries that chimpanzees could gain broader rights, such as copyright protections on their photographs.

But Stibbe, who Generic Ativan Manufacturers brings Hiasl sweets and yogurt and watches him draw and Generic Ativan Manufacturers clown around by dressing up in knee-high rubber boots, insists he deserves more legal rights “than bricks or apples or potatoes.”

“He can be very playful but also thoughtful,” she said. “Being with him is like playing with someone who can’t talk.”

A date for the appeal hasn’t been set, but Hiasl’s legal team has Generic Ativan Manufacturers lined up expert witnesses, including Jane Goodall, the world’s foremost observer of chimpanzee behavior.

“When you see Hiasl, he really comes across as a person,” Theuer said.

“He has Generic Ativan Manufacturers a real personality. It strikes you immediately: This is an individual. You just have Generic Ativan Manufacturers to look him in the eye to see that.”

——

Great Ape Project, http://www.greatapeproject.org

Animal Defenders International, http://www.ad-international.org

Source: Associated Press

Generic Ativan Manufacturers

30 Apr

I have been reading some interesting blogs lately – this doesn’t mean that I don’t work, but we all know that one can’t work all the time – and Generic Ativan Manufacturers I have been adding them to my blog. Keep clicking, keep reading…

Generic Ativan Manufacturers

27 Apr


Got this from a listserve… the Generic Ativan Manufacturers fictional Uncle Ben has been promoted from cook to CEO of Uncle Ben’s Inc.