Zwartboek is the original title of the Paul Verhoeven movie I went to see at the cinema yesterday evening. I went with a Dutch colleague, his German girlfriend – and colleague – and another German colleague. It is a movie about a Jewish Dutch lady who was part of a resistance in Holland during the WWII. Now, I think that the most comon advice to anybody going to live in Germany is ‘Just don’t mention the war and you’ll be fine’.

We went to see the cinema at the suggestion of the Dutch guy (of course, Paul Verhoeven is Dutch), with promises that we would see a great movie. We really didn’t know that it was about the war until we got there. The first objection was raised by the other German lady, who has given me permission to call her Status, just after we bought the ticket. We got into the cinema hall and found that it was almost empty. That was another suggestion of the popularity of the movie. I was able to follow the movie in my not-yet-good German, and in all, it was a good movie, nothing great. The Dutch guy said it was a great movie, his girlfriend said it was a billiger Film (cheap film) that drew from a time in history that was a ready pool to elicit the kinds of feelings the producer wanted it to. Status called it a ‘very boring movie’. The little I have written would show how much Germans do not want to be reminded of the war. Status said that sometime ago when she was a student in China the class was given an assignment to write about why they were proud of their country. Others did but she couldn’t; she wrote about why it was difficult to be proud of her country.

This whole story reminded me of a day I was watching Schindler’s List and a German friend called me. I asked if I could call her back after watching the movie. Immediately the movie ended I called her and the first thing she said, jokingly, of course, was ‘do you hate me now?’ These stories show hard it must be for them to live with the history, something I can only imagine.

My mother called me yesterday evening to tell me that they had been forced to stay at home all day because of riots in the town and the whole state. I was told that people were rioting over the results of the gubernatorial elections. It was alleged that it was rigged in favour of the incumbent. They said that the safest thing to do in such cases is to stay at home…. What can one say about that? The last time it happened was in 1983 when Chief Omoboriowo was announced as the winner of the gubernatorial elections. The violence that resulted from that is still discussed in the state. I really hope that we do not have a repeat of such violence. I was not around then, but I remember that my grandmother told me about ‘Ogun Omoboriowo’, literally ‘Omoboriowo’s war’.

I have been following the April 14th elections on NVS and I have not been surprised by anything. I did not think that we would have a free and fair elections; all I hoped for was that the election would hold anyway, and that people would start getting used to the idea that there are actually terms, and that after a term they either seek re-election or leave office for another person. If we are able to do that, and successfully, then we would be on the way to conducting future free and fair elections.

I stumbled on the Nuhu Ribadu the Nigerian Economic and Financial Crimes Commision (EFCC) boss interview on the BBC website. Now, I understand that there are many probelms with the EFCC but seeing the man talk on the programme really made me feel that he might actually mean what he is doing as the boss of the organisation. I think I actually feel this way because I saw it immediately after I saw Orji Uzor Kalu’s interview. I felt really ashamed that a person whou could lie so blatantly and transparently could say that he wants to become the president of Nigeria.

Sorry that I have not been consistent. Well, consistent wouldn’t be the word now, would it? I posted only once, with my worries and ruminations, and then I stopped posting. Now, I am posting again. I think I should say, with a measure of sureness, that I will do more of this as from now on.

Well, let me take it up from where I left it. I am now in Nigeria, no job yet, but I am managing to survive. I just finished designing a programme in Development Studies by distance learning for the Distance Learning Centre of the University of Ibadan, where I did my B.A. That got me some money, although I haven’t got paid yet… the Nigerian bureaucratic problem. Ok, I am also doing transcriptions of some videos for a professor in the university. There was a series of TV programmes on Getting the University System in Nigeria Back on Track. It is a mighty boring job, trying to get exactly what people said on paper is not the easiest thing to do. It isn’t like I haven’t had any job offers at all; I have. If you remember, I did an M.A. in Development Studies at Uppsala, Sweden, and I am not interested in doing anything apart from a development-related job, and that limits my options to government and NGOs. Well, one NGO offered me a job, offering a pay of 30,000 naira per month (just a little over 200 dollars). Even in Nigeria, that is pretty low. It was an offer I couldn’t accept. I told the Director of the NGO that I couldn’t accept that kind of salary but she says that since I don’t have much of working experience they would have to put me on probation, with that much, and after a year they would review my position with them. Sounds considerate, doesn’t it? But it beats me to think that I might have to live on that kind of salary, which is pretty low, and would probable take care of only my feeding and accommodation. That same thing about working experience would also come up when I went for an interview with Catholic Relief Services on January 24. The post I was interviewed for was Programme Assistant, under their Peace Building, Emergency Response and Governance Programme. What struck me was the emphasis on working experience. How much working experience do you expect from a 25 year-old masters degree holder? I have done a bit during my university days, but I went, almost directly, from my BA to the MA programme, and that means that I couldn’t have had much of experience. What I thought, at the end of the interview, was that if they wanted someone who is fresh from the university, bright, honest, trainable and ready to learn, I would get the job; but if they want someone who has already had some form of training, like every other person who was invited for the interview – a little older – it seemed that the person who was next to me in age was about 30 –I simply did not stand a chance. I have since done a mail to ask how I fared at the interview and I still haven’t heard from them. I just saw an advert in the papers by the Society for Family Health, an NGO that works on reproductive health issues, for Communications Officer. I am simply over-qualified for the job, since they want someone with a BA in Communications – which I do – and with practically no experience. There was no mention of an MA. Also, reproductive health and HIV are simply not my kind of thing. But I think I will apply for the position. I am getting worried about not having a job.

OK, to something more positive. I went with my friend, Adebayo – we call him Sunshine, he is one of my closest friends; you’ll hear of him often – and his Masters in Geographical Information Systems classmates to the National Space Research Development Agency. Oh yea, Nigeria has a space programme, and we even have a disaster monitoring satellite in space, one of four of such. Pretty cool, isn’t it? We were at the ground station of the NigeriaSat-1, and I was really wowed at how efficient the people who run the place looked and spoke. I had never really thought much of satellites but I started thinking more about it when I heard that Nigeria is sending a new satellite, NIGCOMSAT-1, a communication satellite, into space later this year. This means that broadcasting, telephony, internet and other communication stuffs would become more accessible. I don’t think I should say much about satellites and their use so I’ll leave it at this.

OK, people, I will let you know when something new happens in my life.

Anybody ever worried about steps? Anybody ever thought about how a foot is placed before the other, and then the other before it? I have finished one phase of my life and taking the next step, putting the other foot in front of the present one, seems to be a bigger deal than I ever thought. OK, lets break it down. I think identifying the feet is more important than the steps, at least you can’t take a step if you dont have feet. For me things appear to be a little clearer than they may be to you reader. For one, the feet are mine so perhaps I don’t need to identify them, but with time I will spell them out to you so that you can have an insight into the situation I am trying so very much to present to you. Back to steps.

Do steps ever take themselves? Or are people supposed to take steps? This question is very improtant if we are to understand what to do with steps, especially when it has to do with decisions. Ah ah… you guessed right, I am supposed to take a decision very soon, a decision that could affect the train of events in my life. But wait, what decision does not affect the train of events? I read somewhere sometime ago, in a sci-fi novel – cant remember which, but if I do I’ll let you know – that there is the possibility of the existence of a multiplicity of parallel worlds, that each of the decisions we make, each of the steps we take, sparks off a train of events. But that is not all, each of the possible steps we could have taken were actually taken, and they have gone on to start off different trains of events, although in different, parallel worlds. The argument is that if we could concieve time travel not as travel across time, but across space, space meaning parallel worlds, then perhaps we would be tackling the important issue. However, this has not answered the question of travel itself. Enough of drifting, let’s get back to the issue at hand. … anyway, either I take the step or not the train of events are going to be affected. It is making sure that the effect is positive that motivates the desire to take a positive step.

Why dont I leave it off here? Sure; I’ll get back to it pretty soon.